Some Advice for the Inexperienced Proposer

OK so you’ve decided to ‘tie the knot’, to start that time-honoured process that leads to the altar, to children, to mothers-in-law! Congratulations! But where do you begin? How do you choose the right engagement ring, after all the jeweller’s shop has only ever been somewhere that you pass by on the way to the pub. Suddenly it’s become a frightening and unknown torture chamber full of expensive pitfalls. But don’t worry we are here to help!

Before you even get to look with horror at the number of noughts at the end of the price tags, you need to make one big decision – whether to propose with a surpise ring or whether to propose first, then get the ring together afterwards. Like all things to do with women there is no clear cut answer here. On the one hand they love the romance of you down on your knees clutching a huge diamond solitaire, but on the other she’s going to have to wear it for the rest of her life so its only fair to let her choose! I guess the point is here, how well do you know what she would like? – she may have dropped a few pointers along the way such as a note on the kitchen table saying ‘if I were to get engaged, I’d like a princess cut diamond set in platinum’. Harriet and her team (of mostly women!) can advise from a girl’s point of view and do understand the vulnerability of men at this crucial point in their lives!!

But don’t worry, if you do get it wrong, and have chosen from our Hertfordshire or Cambridge shop’s ready to wear ranges, we are always happy to take it back (unworn of course) and exchange it for a commission of the same value or a refund if you bought it over the internet (conditions apply).

A commissioned engagement ring is a wonderful and romantic way to start your engagement as it will have been designed to match your girlfriend’s style and personality (as well as your pocket!). However, do remember that it takes around 6 weeks to handmake a commissioned ring and some girls just can’t wait! Our ready to wear ranges of engagement rings can be bought from our Hertfordshire or Cambridge shops or posted overnight to keep her happy! Unlike most other designers, almost all of our range is a one-off unique design not a mass-produced copy.

If you are thinking of a commissioned engagement ring but are nervous that she might hate your ideas, there are a number of ways around this. One way (that is increasing popular) is for us to source you a stone to propose with. This way the element of surprise is still there, she gets to see you down on your knees clutching something sparkly and you get the fun of designing your unique engagement ring together afterwards. See our information on sourcing your stone with us.

Alternatively we could take the design only up to the final design sketch stage (a large coloured drawing of your design) then begin the making process after you propose – this way it’s not too late if she wants something altered. The third possibility is that we could give you a beautiful card, hand written to say that you have commissioned us to design and make your engagement ring. The final option is our commission in a box. You book the appointment as a surprise and for a very small amount we’ll give you a beautiful pack with information about your designer, goldsmith and so on – a really romantic thing to propose with.

I suppose it goes to show that there are many ways to proceed and not just the obvious. Harriet and her team are always happy to chat through any of this with you.

We all know the saying ‘size doesn’t matter’, well it does when it comes to engagement rings. Although it is possible to alter a ring’s size it is always better to get the size correct to start with. So how do you find her size without her guessing whats going on – tricky! Its not a problem if you are buying from the ready to wear range as we can alter the size or remake the ring after you’ve proposed, but with a commission it’s more important to get it right.

You could steal a ring that you know fits her wedding ring finger and get it sized, but beware as the thickness of the ring will alter the size that is measured and most people’s left and ring hands are different sizes. Alternatively it’s more than likely that her mother or female friends will know – get them to help you! Why not hire one of our ring sizers, then you can be sure from the comfort of your own home.

So now the big one – how much should I spend. Tradition dictates that it should be one month’s salary – but it’s not clear whether this is after or before tax!! But seriously, Harriet prides herself in offering a personal service together with first rate design and craftsmanship whatever your budget. Her goal is happy customers and this is best achieved by ensuring that they walk out of the door with the best engagement ring for them.

Once you’ve navigated this tricky path and emerged unscathed at the other end we are always exited to hear how the proposal went. Our walls are full of email printouts and letters about unusual proposals – on top of mountains, in balloons, whilst rock climbing, rings baked into cakes, the list is endless and we’d love to add yours to it.